Fozzy’s Diagnosis
It’s amazing where my life has gone in the 2 weeks since my last post. I talked about my life changing forever but really had no clue. Both Brian and I received first silicon this month which has meant 50 to 60 hour work weeks for both of us. On top of that, the infection that Fozzy had on his paw turned out to be a tumor and that tumor is canine malignant melanoma. The last 3 weeks have been full of vet visits. First the toe was amputated. Then we couldn’t find anything that would keep him from getting at the bandage. Finally, after he got at the wound 3 times and pulled all his sutures out, we ordered a muzzle to keep him from getting at it. He had to have a second surgery since the damage he did was unrepairable. All of this while I was trying to work 50-hour weeks and Brian was completely available.
Picture of Fozzy with the first contraption to keep him from getting at his foot
Fozzy wearing his new "no chew" bandage that he promptly ate the next day
We found out that it was cancer two weeks ago and my emotions have run the gamut. I immediately made an appointment with the canine oncologist who informed me that for $3000 of treatment his life might be extended 9 months. I think the hardest part was having a choice for treatment. It meant putting a dollar amount on the value of my dogs life and I couldn’t take that. It took a ton of crying and many phone calls to family and friends to finally find peace in my decision not to treat it.
I have been at peace with this decision for a few days now and part of me wishes that I had taken the time to post here to capture all the thoughts and emotions of the moment before I found peace. The one thing everybody kept asking me was if it would hurt any less if he died in two years vs one? Of course not, and my desire to keep him in my life is purely selfish. I will be a wreck when the time comes. I have loved him more than I ever thought a human could love an animal. He was mine and mine alone. He loved Brian but he had an unconditional love and trust of me that I have never known before. I hope that I have given him the best life any owner could give a dog.