…and waiting
This last week has been horrible. I feel like I’m stuck in an emotional void. I can’t morn a dog that’s still alive but my life is not normal right now. I have no choice but to continue as close to normal as possible but I’m plagued by this constant feeling that I forgot something very important… ohh right, my dog is dying.
Yesterday came and went with no call from the vet. More than anything, I hate the waiting. I want to do something. Schedule his surgery, decide on treatment, and get back to living while he can. I’m screaming, crying, and clawing helplessly inside. On the outside, I’m trying not to let this consume me so that I can enjoy my time with him.
As is always true, when it rains if pours. I have a wedding this week (Tuesday no less), a meeting on Sunday, and just got hit with an unexpected presentation next week. I’m just trying to push through. Training? What training? It’s difficult to give things up, but sometimes it’s just time.