The mind of a racer
I don’t get a chance to write as much as I would like so, often, these posts end up filled with thoughts from throughout the week. The first time I thought of posting this week was when I heard of the passing of Erica Greif of the Zoca-Halo sports team. Rather than being killed on her bike (as one might expect) she was killed in a head-on collision on her way to a bicycle race. She took an exam at her University early in the morning, then gave a presentation, then she packed up and drove from Reno to Highland, CA. Sometime after midnight, her car collided with another head-on.
When I first heard this I felt terrible for assuming that the accident was Erica’s fault. As I spoke to others I found the same assumption was common. The thing is, it takes a certain type of person to be an elite athlete. You can’t believe there are any limits to what you can do and what you can ask of your body. Perhaps she took a long nap between her test and the presentation. Maybe she was well rested when she hit the road; but maybe not. The thing is, she wouldn’t have stopped even if she was too tired. Winners can’t have limits. They just can’t. There’s a fine line between having excuses and knowing your limits. To win a race you have to ask unbelievable things of your body. I have lined up for races 18-hours after getting off of 26-hours of international travel. I’ve raced on 4-hours sleep. The risks are less but still high and the mentality is hard to dismiss. I morn for all those who knew her.
The day after hearing this, I lined up to race. Me, Kate, Kirsten, Julie, and Ash. I wore my camera to document what the race looked like. I had been really disappointed in the race before and was determined to redeem myself. In the end, I documented for all time some complete bone-head moves on my part. I lost it during the race. I didn’t race smart and I was desperate to make up for it at the end. I took unnecessary risks and didn’t even use the outcome wisely. The worst part was having to listen to Kate’s critique of my race. While I know I’ll be better for it in the end, it was a very bitter pill to swallow.
Finally I ended the week with Nadia’s wedding. It was so much fun to hang out with everybody. She was beautiful and totally Nadia. We had fun dancing and talking and taking lots of photos. It rained heavily but only during the actual ceremony (which was only 20-minutes). The rest was perfect!
