The View from 58-inches High

Kate and I drove to Houston for the Houston Grand Crit today. It wasn’t originally on my schedule but most of the team was doing it and Brant thought it would be good before Tulsa. Its 2.5 hours (min) to Houston so this was going to be an all day thing. I got myself packed up in the AM, made a sandwich, and headed out the door. Kate and I did an ok of getting on the road on time but, looking back, I don’t think we allowed enough time for pinning, changing, and warm-up. Whatever, I wasn’t taking this very seriously anyway.

Start line

There was nowhere to warm up so Kate recommended we head away from the race where there might be some roads with light traffic. We ended playing red-light/green-light for LT intervals. The worst was that we quickly realized we were a little turned around and only had 10-min before we needed to line up! We stopped at a bar and got directions from some very nice Houstonites and made it back just in time and with very little in the way of warm-up.

We lined up with a great contingent of ladies. Lauren S., Mandy H. (+ 4 teammates),  and Sammi. There was a tough crosswind for most of the course and a tricky U-turn that was all about positioning. I started out feeling the lack of warm-up. I knew I just had to be smart for 2-laps and I’d be good and warmed up. On the second lap, I took the U-turn poorly and had to sprint HARD to get back on but after that I started to feel better and moved up. I was never right at the front but I was mentally preparing for trying to go for primes and making sure I was in a good position. All of a sudden my gears felt wrong. I tried shifting a few more times but my gear didn’t seem to get any easier. I looked back and saw my chain near the bottom of my cassette. At this point, I put my hand up and hoped I would qualify for a free lap after a quick tweak. I held my cable up and road to the mechanic who informed me my shifter paddle was snapped and my race was done.

After the race, my attitude quickly transitioned to “fuck it”. Kate and I rode to the Double Tree to meet up with Kim who had to check out of her room. We joked about how Kim was such a scatter-brain after racing and fucked up it was that my first move after DNF’ing was to call my LBS and demand the manager.

Hey, is Robbie there?

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Yeah, my bike’s broken.
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Trust me, just get me Robbie!
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Robbie, I need this fixed now!

We finally headed back just in time to miss all the free food and the end of the P/1/2 race #fail. We got to the car and found ourselves just as scatter-brained as Kim. Kate couldn’t find her keys. I didn’t even put my bike on the rack. It took us 30-min to get our shit together to roll out of there.

As I was finally making the drive back to my place from Kate’s 12-hours after leaving my house, I thought about how unique my life is. That these moments are so difficult to share with others and that I hoped that these memories would stay with me.

I could not have done a worse job of predicting how this race would unfold. The race started out with Amanda and I on the front. We rolled easy knowing the course was difficult and we would have plenty of time. The first efforts came on the rise to the first turn. Nobody attacked but the effort definitely increased. Amanda and I took the opportunity to get off the front and scope the competition. I stayed second wheel thinking there would be a separation soon. We made the first turn and the second turn and we were still mostly together. I was up front in the stiff cross wind and knew I would need some protection. I played everything well and was able to convince somebody to protect me whenever I needed it.

I was also able to cover every attack. I did not initiate anything but did try to keep breaks going when I bridged. I was very active in this way. I tried to convince others to do the same but the group seemed intent on staying together. At about 4 miles to go, we were neutralized. Nobody was allowed to progress during this time. The pace slowed and we waited for word from the officials that our race was back on. I was second wheel during this time. The race was commenced with about 2 miles to go. Everybody had caught up and recovered by then so it was really just a 2-mile effort. I knew that the strongest girl was going to attack and I planned to be on it. I had completely misunderstood when she was going to attack so when she did, I thought we were closer to the finish than we are. She slowed, and I kept going thinking this was it. I was on my own when we turned the corner and I realized we still had a few hundred meters. My plan disintegrated and, instead of trying to say on the first wheel that passed, I went backwards. I just freaked out and didn’t know what to do. The next thing I knew we were sprinting. The timing on my part could not have been worse. The girl I followed won and I came in 14^th. 14^th in a race where I was never more than 4-wheels back. Where we had it so strung out before neutralization that there was no way I was going to get any worse than 7^th!!

I’m furious at myself for not fighting harder. I gave up and it lost me the race. You can’t win and not risk anything. The minute I realized my mistake, I should have backed off slightly, lowered my cadence and gotten ready for a big dig whenever somebody came around me. It’s so easy to rationalize that now the problem is that I can’t make those decisions when it counts.

The W4 race at Georgetown grand was an exercise in how not to race. I wasn’t expecting to win the race but I was expecting to do pretty well and thought I had a good chance at the podium. I was worried that if I over-thought it or got myself stressed out, then I wouldn’t do well. Unfortunately, I went a little too far in the other direction. I did almost no prep for this race. I looked up directions just before going to bed, I got lost on the way up there because I didn’t look up where to park, and then I had no idea how to get to registration. I also left later than I should have because I felt groggy.

By the time I finally got to registration I was flustered and that’s when things really went downhill. I lost my car keys twice. Once when I left them at registration and once when I left them with the ice guy. I spent countless minutes running around in flip-flops trying to find them. When I say running, I mean full out on cold legs (huge mistake here). Finally, two lost keys, and extra pair of sunglasses, and 1 heart rate monitor later, I was finally warming-up. Yup, all 15-minutes of warm up.

The first lap was difficult but bearable. One very strong girl went off the front early in the first lap and the rest of us chased. I focused mostly on position and not getting gapped. On the second lap, there was one girl in between us and the lead girl. I can’t say if we were catching the second girl or not. I had gone to the front to drive because I was worried about the small chase group getting caught and I wanted to catch the second girl at least! I feel like we were catching her but I also know I didn’t see or hear the crash so she must have had a decent gap. We came up to corner 7 right as she crashed out.

After that, it was just the 7 of us chasing the lead. Of course, I didn’t know how big a gap we had on the pack so I kept trying to get us to work together. Looking back, I really should have attacked. The girls were hopeless. They had no concept of taking turns on the front and when they did pull, they treated it like an attack so that we were always speeding up or slowing down. We were never steady. Somewhere around 17-minutes in, I cramped hard in both calves coming around corner 5 (remember all that running I did earlier?). The rest of the race was spent trying to stretch them out on the saddle to prepare for the sprint. There were times that it felt like we were going so slow! I tell myself that if I hadn’t cramped I could have attacked more. Who knows if this is true. It’s amazing the way your mind twists things once the race is over. Looking at my HR profile, I didn’t have much wiggle room.

When we came into the final turn, I had good position and was feeling strong; outside of the cramping. We separated and kicked out of the turn and up the one rise on the course. I’ve sprinted trough a calf pull before so I wasn’t worried. This ended up being a long sprint! Actually, it was about 270m of sprint. I would have backed off and then kicked closer to the finish, but my calf cramped so hard up that hill that my toes curled and would not uncurl. Not only did I not pass the two girl I should have, but two more passed me! 6th overall. Not the result I wanted and I hate that it came down to good preparation, not training.

This will hopefully go down in history as my worst race ever. I had not been training well leading up to it (ie less time on the bike but really intense workouts). I had also not been sleeping or eating well. My week was basically a lesson in what not to do. The race was at 11:00 so I slept in a little, ate breakfast, and rolled out for my 30-min ride to the course.

Brian was going to drive up later to watch the race. He actually ended up rolling up right behind me. He had is camera with him so I knew at least he’d get some good photos. It was nice to have him out since he rarely gets to see me race. He really didn’t have an excuse with this race being in his back yard.

I had put in some short efforts on my way there but knew it would not be good enough preparation for doing that hill over and over again. We were racing with the elite women so I tracked down Sheri when I got there. She was with Kim and Meredith, who had ridden almost 40 miles from the city. I started rolling with Kim to find out what our game plan was. The next thing I knew we were lined up. This might have been fine for Kim, who had a 2-hour warm-up, but I felt it was too early. For whatever reason, I stayed rather than adding to my warm up. Then our race was delayed by about 10-minutes so my total standing time was almost 30-min. Also, Kim had been the first person to line up so I was right at the start.

When we started, I was on the front with Kim and Kim was motoring like she always does and I rapidly realized I was in over my head. How to you fall back from your own teammate? I slowed down and the gap was rapidly filled in but it was awkward. I need to recover badly. Unfortunately, I pulled back right before the hill and couldn’t recover. Then on the downhill, I ran out of gears and had to chase. That was basically my race.

I was dropped after two laps, caught a few girls that I worked with the rest of the race until the end when I gaped because of a car on the course and botched my sprint. I think I came in 3^rd or 4^th from last. It was horrible. I only beat myself up over it for 24-hours, as is the rule. Then I came down with the worst sore throat I’ve had in years and really wished I hadn’t pushed myself so hard. I was so ready for another try at the driveway this week but after being sick, I know I can’t push it.

I tried to keep my nerves down about this race but when you only race once every 3-weeks, It’s tough to convince yourself that it’s not important. The entire time that I was warming up I just kept reminding myself that it was just for fun but that I should do my best. I got there really early and spent some time getting in a good warm up. I spent a good 15-minutes working myself up-to and out of endurance. Then I started my openers. 5 30-45 second efforts; building with each one. Then I spent 10 more minutes just spinning easy.

It was ladies night which meant the field was large and we had mentored racing. There were a ton of women racing as juniors too. I was nervous but hoped to stay with the pack. We started and immediately I almost get taken out by a 10-14 year old who cuts across the course on the hill. I caught the group but didn’t expect to recover before the next attack. The attacks were plenty and strong but the course made it difficult for anybody to get away.

I felt pretty good and actually covered a strong attack from Tiffany. Annalisa had just covered another attack and I was in great position to grab Tiff’s wheel. As I went by, I heard Anna ask if I had this one. It was a strong attack but I was determined to get on it. I bridged and stuck on her wheel. I knew I should really be working with her to stay away because I knew most of the race consisted of my teammates who wouldn’t chase me down. Still, I thought it was the weenie thing to do.

Just as we got to the top of the hill, Tiffany either gave up on her attack or took a bad line and I saw my chance to redeem myself. I kicked at the top of the hill and did my best to stay away. Again, it’s very difficult because of the downhill. I was caught and found myself back in the pack with two to go.

The last lap came quickly and I was not in a good spot. I needed to move up fast without wasting much energy.  At the start of the race, I hadn’t even considered that I might be contesting the sprint so I was not prepared at all. I knew I needed to be on somebody’s wheel who was strong and who would go early but not too early. I picked one of the juniors. Things were going ok except that it felt like we weren’t sprinting early enough. I just kept seeing the meter markers go by. Then next thing I knew it was 100m and the front folks were going. Kim and Nadia were in the middle of the road and it felt like they had no intention of sprinting. I needed a lane fast! I saw an opening on the outside and took it at full power only to find a lapped rider in my way. It was almost ugly but I managed to break and get around her. I lost at least one position because of it. I took 5^th place but there were at least 2-junior women in front of me so I really took about 7^th.

I was super happy with the way I covered moved and rode somewhat aggressively. Given everything I’ve been though, I feel much stronger than I expected. There was drama and controversy after the race; but what else is new.